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Thursday, September 25, 2014

Florence and Pisa and Paris, Oh My!

Wow, stuff suddenly went double crazy here in Europe. I don't think it helps that I caught a cold on day one in Florence, so any time I'm on a plane, train, or hotel, I just zonk out immediately. I am awake, alive, and loving Paris, so I'll go ahead and post instead of zonking right now.

Florence was pretty cool. We continued our tradition there of eating a lot of pizza and gelato. We saw some amazing art. It turns out that it's not the Sistine chapel that tugs at my innards -- it's Michelangelo. The statue of David was just the same. What a talented man! I know Da Vinci is kind of seen as the leader of Renaissance art, but honestly... I think Michelangelo is the better artist. Anywho! We saw a few art museums and enjoyed the Raphaels and Botticellis, but we both thought that the modern art there was even better. I don't mean "modern" like we mean it in the states, where we put a dirty, old sneaker on display and title it "My Life." That's not art... "Modern" in Florence is 18th-19th century, so Impressionism and such. Such beautiful art! 



We also visited a couple of cathedrals there. I'll be honest, I'm getting a bit churched out here, but it was really cool to see where Michelangelo and Galileo are buried, plus Il Duomo is a must in Florence. It has the prettiest exterior of any church I've ever seen. 

Our flight to Paris was from the Pisa airport, so we took a train to Pisa and checked out the tower before catching our flight. I was slightly disgruntled to discover that the leaning tower or Pisa is -- you guessed it -- a church! Not that these churches aren't amazing, it's just that many of them look the same after a while. Haha, we took some very fun pictures there, though. 

I am in love with Paris. People warned me about this city, told me it was dirty, an made sure I lowered my expectations... But it's great! Muuuuch better than Rome  if you're worried about chaos, dirt, and rudeness. I've found the Parisians very pleasant and the city very lively. Everyone here has some kind of passion, and they all seem very happy. It's quite inspiring! 

We got to visit Musee d'Orsay, which is my favorite museum so far. We took a trip to the top of the Eiffel Tower, which scared me to death. We also saw Notre Dame and Versailles. I believe we are finishing off with the Louvre and St. Chapel tomorrow. I love this city and am looking forward to Edinburgh and Dublin, but I'm also getting excited to go home. That's where I'd want to be at this point in the trip though -- ready for a couple more adventures, but reaching a good level of satisfaction. 

Two days later, I'm finally posting this. But skipping the pictures for the most part. We're about to board a plane from Paris to Edinbrgh, and there is no one here at the gate. This will be a great flight! Ps. I highly recommend the catacombs in Paris. It was super creepy, but wow, that was a lot of bones. I later found out that there are 6 million skeletons down there. That number really made me appreciate the damage of the holocaust... The bones just never seemed to end. 

On a happier note, I am thrilled to be going to English-speaking countries again. I love Paris, but I'm eager to end the foreign awkwardness!

Au revoir! Seriously, see y'all in three days.

Friday, September 19, 2014

Of Pizza, Gelato, and Old Stuff

On Tuesday afternoon, after checking out the East Side Gallery in Berlin, we flew to Rome. We've been fearing this stop almost to the point of dread, since Joe has been reading stories online about people being robbed blind by the gypsies, particularly in the area where our hotel is. We took every precaution we could think of: a money belt for Joe, a small purse shoved into the bra for me, and the phone and passports tucked inside my socks, leggings, pants, and boots, all at the same time. No, it is not cool enough in Rome to justify all those layers. Yes, I would like another glass of cold water. Thank you.

East side gallery, Berlin
 I am happy to say that we have not lost a thing in Rome -- not so much as a ticket stub left in a pocket has gone missing. Then again, we have been extras ordinarily cautious!

As a side note, if you are curious about why I said we didn't lose anything in Rome instead of "on this trip," it's because I left my razor in London. Now, a week later, my legs are very European and I have perfected my wookiee yell.

I am very much looking forward to finally doing laundry in Florence tomorrow night. It's our first -- and probably only -- laundry day. Let's face it: we stink and could've used the laundry night a couple days ago, but we just don't feel good about it in Rome. No reason to push our good luck!

Apart from being cautious and overly fearful, Rome has been an amazing experience. I'll be honest though: while I love exploring Ancient Rome and Renaissance Rome, I'm not the world's biggest fan of nowadays Rome... Except the gelato. Gelato makes everything better. When we landed in Rome, I was very surprised at the third world country feel of it. I actually, in real life, went to the US government health site to verify that the water was safe to drink before I had any. I also sang a rousing verse of "JAI HO!!!" when we arrived in our hotel room. You know, from Slumdog Millionaire? 

It's not the poverty that I don't like about Rome, it's the aggression of the impoverished. That's why it's unsafe to carry valuables in your pocket. People steal, people use kids as beggars. People shove purses, shawls, and maps in your face trying to get you to buy them. If you ignore these people, they yell at you like you stole their money... And to them, I'm sure that's how it feels. The absolute worst was Naples. I loved Pompeii and Vesuvius, but we had to go through Naples to get there, and it was kinda my low point. I finally broke down after walking through it for a while. I lost a tiny bit of control over my year ducts, and called the place "sh*taly." Please note that I was also very hangry. 30 minutes later when I was fed and safe in the train station, I simultaneously felt sorry for my swear and thought I was really funny for it.

I don't hate Rome, guys! I realize I just spent multiple paragraphs ranting about it, but it's true. It was actually worth it. Now that I've described the one negative, I'll give you all of the many reasons that it's been worth a visit: 

1) I already said this, but Pompeii and Vesuvius were incredible. We saw some smoke or steam coming out of the crater...! I may have gently soiled my last pair of underwear right then. That has yet to be determined though, since I am writing this from the train back from Naples to Rome and haven't been to a bathroom yet.

Temple in Pompeii with Vesuvius looking on

At the rim of Vesuvius!
2) Ancient Rome and the Colosseum. I walked on roads and through buildings that are over 2,000 years old. That's true of Pompeii too, but it's the Roman ruins and Colosseum where that really hits you... What amazing architects those people were.

 
The Colosseum at night

3) The Sistine Chapel. There are many pieces of art that you've seen and heard about all your life, but when you see them in real life, you think "Yep, there it is... It looks just like it did in my high school textbook..." The Sistine chapel is different. It honestly took my breath away. The Last Judgment piece of it was particularly moving. I'm not a Catholic, but I am a Christian... And even if you are neither, I challenge you to feel nothing in that room. Good luck with that.

4) Gelato, pizza, and gelato. Also, gelato.

 
Mmmm, pizza...

Those have been the highlights. We also visited St. Peter's basilica, which was really cool. I found the Pieta moving too... It's Michelangelo, man. He really pulls on my heart threads.

The Pieta

Well, until Florence... Ciao!

Rome from the top of the Vatican dome

Monday, September 15, 2014

Frau Bluher!

Hallo! I'm lying in a hotel room in Berlin writing this and eating a Ritter Sport. Why? Because the city sleeps between 6 PM and 10 AM (it's 6:45 PM here now). The stores and museums all close and the streets empty and become silent. I thought Germans were hardcore partiers -- where do they go?!

We've been here for two days now and absolutely love how quiet and relaxing the city is. It's a much-needed break after a week in London! Speaking of, here is how we spent the remainder of our time in London and our two days here:

On Thursday we explored St. Paul's Cathedral and climbed to the top of the dome. Unfortunately, the little old bird woman wasn't there to sell us food to feed the birds for toupence a bag. :( I might have pouted a little; I don't remember. We then ventured to Abbey Road and took a couple of awesome shots there, took a nap, and checked out the National Gallery for a few minutes before we saw Richard III starring -- wait for it -- Martin Freeman. It got mediocre reviews, but we thought it was a lot of fun and that they'd done a great job modernizing it. 
Crossing Abbey Road
On Friday we walked through Hyde Park, watched the changing of the guard at Buckingham Palace (would not recommend!), and explored the British Museum before nap time. After a nap, we headed to the West End to see Wicked, which was fantastic! I insisted on buying cupcakes afterwards. It was my birthday; I couldn't not eat cake!
Changing of the Guard
On Saturday we wandered until we found the Millennium Bridge and The Globe, which we didn't have time to cross or explore, but it they were still fun to see. We met a high school buddy of Joe's in Hyde Park and his girlfriend and chatted until it was time to head to the airport. Airporting and reaching our hotel in Berlin pretty much took up the rest of the day. It was so weird when we arrived -- it was 10:30 PM on Saturday night, and yet the streets were empty and quiet.  I've loved that here! But I have to say, Berlin wasn't so quiet for a while after we found out that Joe passed the Bar that night!
Joe and Greg
On Sunday we walked to the Brandenburg Gate and went through the holocaust memorial for the Jews murdered in Europe. It was really sad. I mean, you know it's sad, but then you hear individual stories and experiences and realize that every one of the victims had a story just as tragic... It puts the whole thing into perspective like nothing else ever has. We walked over to Checkpoint Charlie and read about the division of Berlin. Then we went to a DDR museum to see what life was like in East Berlin in the time of the wall. That was a ton of reading and site-seeing for one day, so we went back to the hotel after a delicious doner and crashed. Well, I crashed, anyway. Joe did some more tourist research. :)
Pieces of the Wall at Checkpoint Charlie
Today, Monday, we woke up early because we had a 9:00 reservation to tour the Reichstag. The dome was so cool! The roof of the building is transparent so that everyone can see what the German government is up to from now on. The top of the dome had a great view of the whole city. We took a train to Sachsenhausen (a concentration camp in Berlin that held mostly criminals; most Jewish criminals were transferred to Auschwitz pretty quickly). What a sad tour! It's heart-breaking to go to the actual location and hear stories of what happened in certain areas. Sachsenhausen was by far not one of the deadliest concentration camps yet, all by itself, it was horribly deadly and tragic. On the way back from Sachsenhausen we stopped to see a small remaining section of the Berlin Wall, which was pretty cool. It's very tall but surprisingly thin considering its purpose!
Inside the Reichstag Dome
When it gets a little darker tonight, we're going to check out Brandenburg Gate all lit up. Tomorrow we are off to Rome. We're a bit worried about thieves and pickpockets there... So we wish us luck!

Guten abend!

Update: It's 9:13 PM and we just got back from Brandenburg Gate. The city is NUTS on Monday night. I don't know what everyone's doing tonight, but it is not FHE.

Wednesday, September 10, 2014

Stonehenge Tower Abbey Castle of Bath

First off, sorry about the boring pictures -- I am posting with my phone and have taken very few pictures on it. I'll post good ones from the camera later.

Joe and I have been in London for three days now and are thoroughly enjoying ourselves. Right at this moment we are on a coach (bus. Good old Brits!) back to London from a tour. We saw Windsor castle, the Roman baths, and Stonehenge today.


Needless to say we were a bit rushed doing all that in one day, but we did see some amazing things... Like the originals of tons of paintings of royalty they use in history books and the tombs of several past monarchs, including Henry VIII. 

I learned a lot of things about a lot of different people from different times, but the most important thing I learned today  is this: I need to buy Pringles more often. They are magical. I sincerely hope they sell cheese and onion Pringles in the states, 'cause I bought a small pack in Bath today and I'd really like a repeat on those.

Yesterday we tackled Westminster Abbey and the Tower of London. Our guide at the Tower was a funny, dry, old tower guard who constantly threatened to lock the kids up in Beauxchamp. He informed us that most executions did not occur on London Tower, but "on Tower Hill, over there just beyond that ancient Tudor... Ice cream truck." I was also very amused by a little British girl there who looked about six years old and had never seen an English guard before. 

A tower guard led a group of them past, and she yelled "Mum, what are those?"

"What, the bayonets?"

"No, the men."

"Those are Beefeaters."

"No, not the Beefeaters, the other ones."

"Oh! Um..."

"They have big, tall, fllllooffy hats! I love big, tall, flooffy hats!"

Yeah, I had a good chuckle about that girl. We spent our first evening in London seeing The Mouse Trap at St. Martin's Theatre. It was great, but staying awake was quite a challenge after hardly sleeping in the last 30 hours.

Tomorrow we're checking out the British Museum and Buckingham Palace. We're hoping to get tickets to Comedy of Errors at The Globe for the evening, but we'll see what happens. If it's sold out (likely), we'll hit Les Mis instead. 

Until later, enjoy this picture of The Tower of London from Tower Bridge:


Cheers!

Thursday, February 27, 2014

Overheard in the office

It's easy enough be negative about your job -- you spend 1/3 of your day there (nearly all of your waking hours!) and it's not typically something you enjoy doing; at least, not enough to do on your own without being paid. To alleviate the usual work frustrations, I've decided to relive some of my favorite moments from work recently. I work with some very fun people!

The conductor of one of my daily meetings, Dave, was unable to make it to work on time, so he called in on the conference room phone. He explained that his bees were angry that morning and that he'd needed to suit up and plug up the tops of his hives so that the bees could calm down before going back in. 

Charles: "You know, bees can sense electromagnetic disturbances in the atmosphere. This could be indicative of some kind of impending catastrophe."
Jaynee: "The apocalypse itself!"
Dave: "...I think it was spilled sugar water." 
Silly us!

Later in the same meeting...

Dave: "Aaah! A bee!"
A few minutes later...
Dave: "Hey, do you guys want to hear some bees?"
Scott: "I want to hear 'Aaah!' again."
Dave: "That was me going 'Aaah!' Okay, here are some bees" *buzzing through the speaker*
Scott: "Hey, ask them about Thor!"

Two stories need to be told for this quote: 1) A UX engineer, Geoff, had been helping a fellow writer improve the look of our documentation website. 2) We have a comment feature in our documentation that a customer has recently discovered. He keeps asking questions that we already answer in the documentation, so he's not bothering to read before asking.

Geoff: "Craig, you are going to have the most beautiful thing that no one will ever read!"
Me, laughing: "That was the funniest, most accurate thing I've heard all week."

Craig: "Well, at least we know <customer who keeps commenting> reads our documentation."
Me: "Yeah, well... wait. No, he doesn't."
Craig, laughing: "I think that actually wins funniest thing said all week."

On the van home one day...

John: "Jaynee, is this your hat?"
Jaynee: "Nope. I saw it in the back last week. Has no one claimed it?"
John: "I think it might be Winnie's. I wonder where she's been. Maybe she's too cold without her hat."
Neil: "Sorry, I can't come to work until Spring -- I lost m'hat!"

Sunday, October 27, 2013

Marriage Lessons Learned from Funerals

On Thursday, October 10th, my husband and I took the day off work to drive to Iona, Idaho and attend the funeral of my last grandmother, Barbara Elliott ("Toady Gramma"), who died on Friday, October 4th. She'd suffered from severe Alzheimer's for years. She also suffered from hearing loss, which made her as amusing (though in a sad way) as her funny, lively personality made her when she was more "with it." For instance, here are some Grandma quotes from my Aunt Helen's funeral last December, which she hollered instead of whispering to my grandpa:

(Repeatedly to my sister-in-law, as if it were her doing) "This is a good party! These are beautiful flowers."

(As a large man walked into the viewing room) "Boy! He ate his mush!" Cue Grandpa's smacking her in the face with his program. ;)

(As an African American woman with long dreadlocks walked into the viewing room) "Johnny, look at the hair on that darky!" I still contend that old people are allowed to be racist because they don't know any better. So rather than cringe as you would with a middle-aged or younger person, you have to chuckle a bit-- except in this case, where, I assure you, the woman heard.

Anyway, some great things were said at her funeral. How she was incredibly service-oriented, adored her children and grandchildren, and how she had an unmatched sense of humor and love of throwing parties and dressing people up. In the end, there were far more laughs than tears at her funeral. I think that's a mark of a truly special, unique person.

I finally started crying when my dad talked about Grandpa's reaction to Grandma's death. He was a lost puppy, and understandably so! They had been married for 72 years, eight months, and had dated for three years. He was miserable and didn't know what to do with himself. Fortunately for him, however, and unfortunately for us, he only had to suffer his loss for 19 days. He, John Elliott, died on Wednesday, October 23rd. His funeral was yesterday.

The last conversation I had with Grandpa was at the luncheon after Grandma's funeral. As I said good-bye to him (I knew it was my actual good-bye for life, though I treated it more to him as a "see you later"), he said "Jaynee, I hear you got married recently. I was married for 72 years!" He is a quiet man, so I couldn't hear exactly what he said next, but I caught the word "happy." He either said "I was very happy," "I hope you are as happy," or gave me advice, such as "You have to work at it to be happy." All three messages were received and taken to heart at his funeral yesterday.

His entire life was caring for my grandma. He built her a house, and, apart from about 2 years, beginning a year into their marriage, when he fought in WWII, he never left her side nor the tiny town of Iona where both were raised and married. Grandpa was a quiet and simple man while my grandmother had what he called "go-itis," constantly needing to go out and do things. He took her wherever she needed, even in the last few years as her mind suffered but her body did not, and his body suffered but his mind did not. He fought to keep up with her and care for her.

These deaths were very sad for us -- Iona, Idaho was a big part of our childhood, as were our Grandma and Grandpa Elliott. Now all three are gone until we go. They left us with very important lessons about marriage, though. At my grandpa's funeral in particular, the emphasis was on their life together (they didn't really have lives outside of each other. 72 years!). In my dad's talk, the phrase, said by my uncle to my dad the day Grandpa died, was repeated: "It's a love story." Some lessons I learned from my grandparents are these:

It doesn't matter how different you and your spouse are, as long as you are both willing to serve each other and work hard at it.

Love is perfect when you love and serve constantly.

It's okay to laugh at yourself -- please do!

Pet names can go a long way (my grandpa called my grandma "Bobby," and she called him "Shawn." we never figured out the Shawn thing).

Do what you are passionate about. Support your spouse in pursuing his/her passions. 

BE HAPPY. 

On a final note, here's a song a coworker on my team sent to the rest of us. He said it was very touching, and he was not wrong: 

I listened to this all week, and it shows really well the feelings I have about my grandparents. :)

Wednesday, September 4, 2013

Moaning Myrtle

I am not going to comment (beyond this sentence) about how long it has been since I have posted, and I will not make excuses not will I promise future posts. Life has been busy, but here I have a moment to write about one of many, many goings-on that make life so great. To start, Joe and I just ended an incredible summer together. It began in May with the official end of his second year of law school and a move from the hobbit hole on State to a house 2 miles north of it. While we miss our first home as a married couple, we could not be happier with our new (and old -- this is the house I grew up in) house!

In July, Joe and I took a trip to the Humane Society of Utah and picked out a cat. We wound up with a darling 2-year-old tabby named Veria (My theory is that she belonged to a little, old lady who had to give her up when she moved to a retirement home... Because, well, 'Veria'? Really?). We brought her home and immediately started calling her Eunice (as in What's Up, Doc?), but that didn't last long. Eunice high-tailed it for the space behind the toilet when we let her out of the tote and could not easily be persuaded out for several days. We decided that she was haunting the toilet -- you know, sitting in the u-bend, thinking about death. So we called her [Moaning] Myrtle. Or, when she's in trouble, Myrtle Eunice Johnson.

I'm quite sure my taking her to the vet for the visit that I agreed to in the adoption contract did nothing to alleviate her nerves. For weeks, she probably believed that anytime I gave her a treat, I was tricking her into a ride in a non-air conditioned car to have a needle thrust in her leg and a thermometer shoved up her butt. Despite that unpleasant adventure, however, she's adjusting very well to her new home. We love playing with her, despite the fact that her new favorite game is attacking feet from under the bed and her most active hours are between 5 and 9 AM.

There you have it; we are officially parents now! Well, besides the fact that our new daughter cleans herself, has some degree of built-in portion control when eating, is litter trained, and can be left at home alone over a weekend, we are.